I think the sun, swimming and all-inclusive food supply in Mallorca triggered a growth spurt. Everyone is aghast how massive I’ve suddenly become:
Right now, I feel quite beautiful carrying my bump. When I catch my reflection I’m all curves and contours. I, perhaps misguidedly, feel like the belle of the ball – with people paying attention, staring and commenting. They are probably thinking: ‘crikey, poor thing’, but I’m so proud of my shape as a sign of my (hopefully) thriving little girl.
My younger sister is a midwife and has had a prod of my belly. She says the baby inside is still quite small – and it’s just my womb that’s expanded, giving her a relatively large arena to swim around in that she will grow to fill.
Currently grappling with the world of prams and buggies. Three-in-ones, foot muffs, adjustable frames. I need to immerse myself in the detail to make sure we get the right one considering how pricey they are. I promised Jake that we would get a second hand one, and that I wouldn’t get sucked into the world of fancy status prams and pointlessly expensive yummy mummy accessories, but now it’s come round to it – I don’t want a battered a second hand pram with Greggs pastry flakes in the cracks that smells faintly of another infant’s sick. I want a sparkling carriage for my princess. I may regretfully have to renege on my promise and buy her a new one, by hook or by crook.
Also downloaded a hypnobirthing hour session from iTunes, focussing specifically on pain management. The jury is out so far. I must confess I turned it off after twenty mins. I can’t really relate to it at the moment because I’m not actually giving birth. Maybe it will seem more relevant when there’s someone the size of a bowling ball barging their way through my nethers.
Feeling well and positive. My breathing has gone geriatric: short and breathless – but that’s normal as your diaphragm gets squashed. I have maddening restless leg feelings in bed at night where I just want to kick and punch my legs, which feel like they are pent up and twitching with energy.
Jake and I are having more frequent ‘is this really happening?’ moments, as we try to wrap our heads around the fact that she is going to materialise and isn’t just a fun idea and something to look forward to in the future. She will actually be here. Soon. She will fill the baby grows in the drawer, the house with noise and the bin with shitty nappies. I have never waited with such anticipation to meet another human being. Some days I feel I will combust with excitement.